Things About Me that Confuse People, Whose Confusion Ends Up Confusing Me
In the past few years, I have been experiencing this phenomenon where I am speaking, sharing relevant (or tangential) facts about myself as part of the conversation, and the person “listening” will react in bewildered confusion. As if I had said something so far fetched and out this world, it requires a double take. So today’s post is a list (and elaboration) of those things. Happy confusion, but I hope the one thing we all have no confusion about is the goal for a #FreePalestine!
I workout everyday
This one has been a frequent occurrence as I resume the dating extravaganza . I cannot, for the life of me, understand why every guy I have matched with and/or gone out with is in absolute shock upon hearing this fact — which is ironic given every single one of these dudes has “Looking for a gym partner” in their bios. Honestly, the boys are not alright.
I decided to go back to school (again)
Last March, I completed an MBA, my second postgrad degree, and it was THE journey for sure. (I’ve written about it on said blog.) Somewhere along the journey, anytime I spoke with someone — be it a guy or a “friend” or a community member — and they learned I willingly chose to return to school and pursue the gift and blessing of self development and growth through education (lol), they would twist their facial expressions into disgust and confusion and ask, “Why?!?” I still do not know how to answer that stupid question. Like why do people who go to school GO TO SCHOOL? Some people want to further their careers. Some of us are nerds, haha, who love to immerse themselves in academic and research settings. (This kind of reminds me of the stupid and invasive questions I receive revolving around my choice to live a child free life — all the times, the answer is because that’s what I want and it’s never going to be your business.)
My neat handwriting for a “lefty”
One time, I was sitting at the Nordstrom e-Bar at The Grove in Los Angeles (probably one of my favorite shopping centers in the world, especially around the holidays). I was writing my notecards to refresh my mind on the bullet points I was to cover on a panel discussion that evening. An elderly couple was passing by my table when the woman glanced at my index cards and said, “Oh my goodness! Is that really your handwriting? And with your left hand?!” She called her husband over and I laughed as I demonstrated the words. That particular experience wasn’t annoying, more entertaining really, but it’s more the confusion people have over the fact that a left hand could possibly write as neatly as a right one. I almost feel it’s some sort of prejudice, an assumption that left hands are incapable — not designed like right ones. Wait till people find out I’m not even a lefty, but an amby (ambidextrous)!
I only wear high heels
Okay, so maybe people’s confusion here shouldn’t confuse me, haha. But why is it so bewildering what someone wears? Like left hands, people’s other body parts are also very capable of doing things well. My issue with these reactions is the limitations people hold so strongly about human capacity/capabilities — as well as the assumption that there is one right way to live or do things.
When I have a salad craving
I blame the anti-diet culture movement for this. (Insert major rolling eyes emoji here!) I had really been enjoying my time off social media and a big part of that was freedom from the severe toxic positivity and pop psychology posts — most of which were absolute jokes that people were holding onto like scripture instead of utilizing real psychological tools to heal and grow. People were posting things left and right that screamed nonsense and it was too ridiculous and exhausting for me, especially the BS that revolved around dismantling and destroying anyone or anything that even remotely sounded like weight loss or management was shamed. Badly. But someone eating Chik Fil A on a daily basis and posting it was applauded for their body positivity? Diet is not a bad word. Diet extremes (in either direction) are bad. Twenty-five years ago my brother and I were hospitalized for salmonella poisoning. We were in there for almost a week and were placed on what was called the BRAT Diet — Banana, Rice, Applesauce, and Toast. (I still remember that like it was yesterday because of the trauma of it all, but it was a bonding experience for sure!) My other brother has a sensitive heart and immune system and when he was hospitalized a few years ago, he too was placed on a diet. My point is we have to do away with this idiotic logic that dieting is bad. That wanting to lose weight is shameful. That someone proud of their progress at reclaiming their health and fitter bodies is taboo. And we also need to embrace the fact that people can seriously crave salads and/or other healthy foods. When I experience motion sickness (especially on airplanes) all I crave and can digest are fruits. When my body is not in the best moods, I have a serious craving for either a caesar salad (my favorite) or a garden salad with Italian dressing.